tumpasan
by magma maiden
Summary: he returns and he returns. indra makes her decision. [ ashuin; fem!indra; part 3/3 of lelangon pembangkang ]


**naruto (c) masashi kishimoto; trade fic**

 **tumpasan - stain**

 **tumpas - to eradicate**

 **last part of lelangon pembangkang trilogy**

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Time is a river and destiny its streams, where every thing flows in tiny bowl shaped leaves, lulled towards an ocean where the world and human knowledge ended, and nobody—no matter how strong, could alter its currents. Yet here she was, clinging to her own being, soaked to the bone, trying to swim against the flow. Her father and uncle had done incredible feats in their youth, their deeds immortalized into legends and songs, their statues erected and prayed upon.

If her father was a god, then she had inherited his godly blood, making her not wholly human, then surely this damned flow could be stopped. Reversed, even! She was Indra, the first born of Hagoromo, whose strength was unparalleled by any living being!

Except by _him._

The downpour slowly ceased, leaving clear pools filled with dead grasses and leaves. Swamp creatures merrily sang with their deep croaks and quacks. Calling their family to gather and enjoy the blessing from the sky. As they celebrated, she watched them with obvious disgust, holding an urge to torch the swamp with her fiery breath.

But she didn't, because it'd give away her hiding. Burnt frogs and ducks wouldn't make great breakfast anyway.

The embers on her small campfire crackled to life with her single breath. She had added more dry branches into it, providing enough warmth for a few hours, at least until the sun is high enough and the pools dried up. She hated walking on wet soil. It dirtied her socks and sandal, and she didn't bring another pair with her. Her only belongings were food, rice cakes and dried venison slices she stole last night which were also soaked by the downpour. Warming them helped her chew, but the flavor didn't improve in the slightest. At least her only clothing had dried.

Those swamp creatures were getting noisier. She grabbed a rock and threw it as hard as possible to the furthest pool. That silenced them, and for a moment Indra enjoyed her small victory over the nature. She leaned at the uneven rocky wall of the cave, relishing her solitude before the croakings and quackings echoed once more.

A pair of glowing yellow eyes greeted her when she woke up.

* * *

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.

It was all _his_ fault, as usual.

He stayed only for a day. One day of fake hypnotic bliss. Then came the news of a harsh storm hitting his home, and he left immediately to help his followers.

 ** _You committed a taboo._ **The creature that called himself Zetsu appeared in her room, when she couldn't sleep, missing the warmth he had been provided. _**A taboo with the usurper, once more he will take what's yours. Will you let him have his way?**_

The illusion shattered in the morning. Indra remembered the dread, the relief, and the rage flooding within her. How could she think things were finally alright? That she didn't have to hide anymore? She thought they had found peace. She thought she had found peace.

Indra tried to do her daily activities by herself, but as her pregnancy progressed she had no choice except to take more rest. She could no longer stood for a prolonged time, and few weeks ago she had stopped teaching her students. Swollen ankles, insomnia, back pain… she couldn't even lie to sleep anymore.

Her child would be a strong baby, she could tell it. The baby's own chakra begin to pulsate on its own a week ago, brimming with life, eager to see the world beyond her womb. According to a midwife, her due date was approaching. Indra was excited, yet afraid.

What if people ask? Her followers had been silent on the subject since Indra refused to answer it in the beginning of her pregnancy. _He_ knew where she lived. Her persistent, stubborn, childish little brother. Knowing him, he would be back as soon as he could.

And he did.

* * *

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It was late summer. The air wasn't as hot as before. Rain frequently poured over the ripening rice fields and orchards. The time for harvesting produce was arriving. There would be enough food to refill their granary, then the farmers could plant the winter crops on the emptied fields.

Her baby would be born in the best time of the year. Plenty of food and people to look after her child.

Indra was reviewing their supplies over her lunch with her followers when an apprentice rushed through the corridor. She gave him a glare when he stopped at her room. Her attendant clicked her tongue in disapproval, while another scolded him.

He immediately knelt and apologized on the doorway. "Pardon my intrusion, Lady Indra! Lord Ashura is here!"

She felt her body went cold. Her servants and followers welcomed the news in delight, but all Indra could feel was numbness. The male servant who brought it was grinning ear to ear. She shifted on her seat, and her attendant quickly fixed the pillows on her back.

"Shall I bring him here?"

Ten pairs of eyes turned to her.

What's the harm in letting him in? A small voice in the corner of her heart screamed that she shouldn't, that he would shatter her world again, that he would draw her followers to his side—

A kick to her side cut her thoughts. She caressed her own stomach, calming her baby and gritting her teeth to hold the pain.

"Your baby is eager to meet the uncle," an attendant said with a big smile on her wrinkled face.

"So cute!" shouted another.

 _It's not like that,_ Indra was about to say it when another kick happened. She gasped for air. Her child was never this active, kicking only once every several hours. She had to go. He couldn't see her like this again!

"Sis!"

Before her attendants could help her stand, Ashura appeared at the doorway. His face was brighter than the sun, tearing up upon seeing her. He jumped over the news bringer, almost knocking over a low table to reach her seat. He knelt before her, clasping her hands.

"Ashura..."

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Sis!" Ashura placed her hands on his forehead. He dipped his head low, almost touching the tatami. "The storm hit us harder than we expected. We lost some people, houses gone, rice scattered… I couldn't go here sooner!" He fixed his eyes to Indra's widened ones. "I'm here now, Sis," he said, half whispering. "I'm here. I'll stay."

"You can't—"

"That's so sweet of you, my lord!" A maid exclaimed from across the room. "So eager to meet your niece or nephew!"

Ashura turned his head to look at her. "Oh, no. I have to be here during the birth because," he paused to grin, "I am the father."

Indra shouted, but nothing came out from her throat. All the noises of joy silenced at once upon his confession. All the smiles on her followers' face faded, replaced by shocked expressions.

"Lord Ashura…" an elderly man spoke, the same man who let him inside her house months ago, "my lord… is the father of Lady Indra's baby?"

"I am!"

Indra pulled her hands roughly from his grasp. He was surprised by her action; immediately holding her arm and mistaking it as a sudden pain's reaction. She shoved his arm away.

"Get me out of here," she hissed to her attendants. They rose on her sides, silently helping her to leave the room and her unfinished lunch. Indra let them go with a wave of her hand once they reached the corridor, away from her shocked followers. As expected, he was following closely behind.

"Why are you here?" she growled, low and dangerous, her shoulders shaking from anger and shame. "Why can't you just stay behind and leave me alone?"

"I… I'm sorry. I thought you'd prefer me here… our baby is due soon."

"'Ours'?" she repeated, half laughing, her voice unusually high. "Did you not see we have committed a taboo?"

"Taboo…?" Ashura lifted his hands, but pulled them back before reaching Indra. "Sis, please don't be angry, it's bad for our—"

"We are siblings! Twins!" Indra gritted her teeth, leaning at a wooden post. "Siblings do not—" She lost her balance, but quickly regained it. Her abdomen contracted briefly.

It's not now. Her mind was filled with relief. It's not now. Her hands trembled as she pulled herself up. Ashura remained where he was, although undoubtedly he would be by her side had she didn't shout at him. She glared at him, her sharingan flaring.

"This is all your fault." Her chakra surged out, cracking the ceiling and floor. Debris fell around them. "I hate you."

Ashura froze.

" _Leave._ "

* * *

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They whispered about her and him. Her followers; servants and students alike. They avoided her sight. They stopped speaking around her unless she addressed them first.

The brief contractions returned occasionally throughout the day, but she knew it's not her time yet. A local midwife checked her condition regularly. Indra could see the disgusted look on her face whenever she touched her belly.

 _ **Ashura has left,**_ Zetsu told her, _**quietly, this afternoon. The news has spread, though. What are you going to do about it?**_

Killing them was easy. She could call her susanoo and eradicate everyone under one clean sweep of its sword. But not when she's about to give birth. The nearest village was one day journey on foot.

When she retreated into her chamber for sleeping, Zetsu had waited for her with supplies. They slipped away unnoticed, covered by the night. The thick cloud hanging above the valley blocked star light from reaching the ground. Darkness wasn't a problem for Indra and the strange creature. Her entire body was tired and hurt; only because of her sheer willpower she managed to cross the wilderness on foot.

If the rain didn't start, she wouldn't be forced to take a shelter inside a cave.

By sunrise, Zetsu had returned with fruits. Apples and oranges he stole from a nearby orchard. The frogs and ducks had stopped singing. She ate her breakfast in silence, planning ahead. After she gave birth, she would return immediately and wiped off her followers' memories. That shouldn't be hard. If the rumors had left her domain, then Zetsu could bring them to her—

 _ **Oh, it's starting.**_

He's right. The contraction returned in regular interval, slowly building up, each was more intense than before. Tears welled in her eyes as the pain spread to her back. Eyes closed, fingers tightly gripping the cloth she used to wrap her belongings.

Her water broke.

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He loved her more than anything else, more than their father's legacy. More than anything else in the world. He was willing to do anything for her, and for her only.

He thought he had done the right thing, being present for their baby's birth. He didn't want to come home. That place no longer felt like home to him, not when his beloved and dearest sister chose to exile herself away from him. When Indra told him to leave, all of his energy seemed to disappear without a trace. Numb.

Is she happier without him? If that's the case, why did she hate him so? Had he done anything that displeased her? He remembered how warm she was when they were young, how she used to calm him in his restless sleep, how she patiently explained their father's intricate knowledge to him…

Why does everything he did for Indra angered her?

"Lord Ashura!"

A horse was quickly approaching. It was the elderly servant who helped him inside Indra's house many months ago. Ashura gave him a weak smile as a greeting. "Morning, gramps," he nodded at him while wringing his shirt. "Why are you—"

"Lady Indra is gone!"

"Where—"

"She left no trace… but we think she's heading to the west—please take my horse!"

Ashura dropped his soaked shirt and did as he say.

* * *

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Pain. There was nothing else for Indra in the last several hours. Her throat hurts from screaming.

She wasn't prepared for this. A midwife and attendants should be here, ready with warm water and herbal concoction to ease her delivery. But she was alone, in the wilderness, with no one to rely on but herself.

Push.

She thought of her father. Is he watching now? Watching the birth of his grandchild, a manifestation from an unholy union? What would he think and do? Pretending he saw nothing? Pretending he never saw Ashura's affection to her?

Her chest constricted. Thunder clashed outside, threatening to start another downpour. There were faint marks on the cave ceiling. Indra focused her sharingan on them, dusts and debris piled under her fingernails, sweat drenching every inch of her body.

Push.

Breathe.

Scream.

Indra couldn't scream anymore. Coldness seeped into her body, her chakra flooded out of her system. Her arms couldn't support her weight anymore, and she slumped on the cave wall, panting heavily. Her body was shaking, but weakly, a futile attempt to warm herself against the dropping temperature.

 _I'm not going to die here._ She blinked, her vision blurred. _I'm not going to…_

Heat shot into her chakra core. A warm, pleasant heat. Her eyelids fluttered, she regained her energy.

Then, faintly, a voice calling, "...Sis? Hang in there."

She felt an arm supported her back upwards, enabling her to push harder. He kept repeating the last sentence, shielding her from the cold with his own body. Indra recognized this feeling. Half annoyed, she grumbled, "idiot."

Ashura rubbed her arms, one hand hovering above her stomach. It glowed green. "Just a little more…" His voice cracked. "A-almost there…"

She found his hand, and he shared his chakra to her. Indra leaned at his chest, gathering her strength and pushing for one last time. A sudden relief flooded her body, her breathing shallow and quickened, eager to fill her lungs with fresh air—

A deafening cry filled the cave.

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If time was a river, and she could row her bowl shaped leaf wherever she pleased, to which direction she go?

Ashura leaned forward to reach for the child, when she heard him shout and his chakra flared dangerously. Indra, still dazed from childbirth, could only stare at her twin in confusion. His attention was focused elsewhere, at something across of them.

Something's wrong.

He seethed, "who are you?"

 _ **No one,**_ Zetsu's voice answered. _**Congratulations, it's a boy.**_

A chill ran down her spine. "Ze… tsu…" Indra muttered, propping up her body to sit. "Give him." She gritted her teeth, ignoring the pain between her legs and on her full chest. Ashura's hand still held hers. Her brother still healed her and shared his chakra.

 _ **Mm.**_ The shadow creature had the boy in his arms, wrapped in a cloth. His yellow eyes looked at the newborn almost tenderly, had it not for the grinning mouth full of jagged teeth. _**You sure you want him?**_

Ashura turned to her. There were dried tears on his cheeks.

"Give me my son," Indra repeated, her eyes bore into Zetsu's.

 _ **I can take care of him,**_ he offered. _**Swiftly. Painlessly.**_

"No!"

 _ **No?**_ He sounded disappointed, like a child who was told that he wouldn't eat candies anymore. _**Do you want to deal with him yourself?**_

"...Sis, what's he saying?" Ashura whispered, his voice trembling. He looked like he was five again, watching a friend slowly succumbing to an untreatable fever. Her usually boisterous brother was silent, consumed by grief, his smiles and laughs for the following days were painful to watch.

Despite his immense powers that could flatten a hill effortlessly, his fear was apparent in his eyes, as if he was staring into death itself.

 ** _Have you forgotten who you are? Your powers? Your destiny?_ **The baby stirred, and Zetsu rocked him gently. They made an odd image together, especially after his threat.

"If… if you want something… we'll give it. Anything. Just… don't hurt him..."

Zetsu sneered at him. _**I am here to do what your sister wishes. And that is to eradicate the proof of taboo you made her to commit.**_

Ashura's hand slipped away from hers.

 _ **Right?**_

On his arm was a baby drenched in the water of her womb, an innocent being caught in an unfortunate situation—

But people would ask. Even if they hunted down every single individual who heard Ashura's confession—

The river called destiny unfurled its loophole visible only to her and allowed her to decide what path she would take; upstream to another affluent, or downstream with all the consequences—

She was Indra, the firstborn of the Sage, granddaughter of a goddess—

"You can kill me if you hate me." Ashura distanced himself from her, and coldness assaulted her senses again. "I know you're angry at me—"

 _Stop it._

"—I don't… I don't know why, but I'm sorry, Sis, I'm so sorry. Please… please spare our—"

"Ashura, shut up." Indra's legs trembled, and she tightened her blood soaked clothes around her slender body. She beckoned Zetsu to come closer. "Give me the child. I'll deal with this myself."

The creature hummed happily and did as she say. Indra cleaned her baby's face, checking his body for any sign of deformities. Her heart was pounding with relief upon knowing that he was utterly healthy. His tiny lips opening and closing, hopeful. Hungry.

Holding the baby close to her chest, Indra activated her sharingan.

Ashura knelt on the cave floor, surrendering to her decision.

She rowed her bowl shaped leaf towards her choice of destiny, signed with her black flames.

* * *

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Her amaterasu had torn a hole on the cave wall. There were no remains left except the charred marks on its surroundings and the echo of his screams. She made sure the victim couldn't escape her power, and waited until the amaterasu finished its job while breastfeeding her son. She had shielded his small ears from the screams, humming while he suckled her milk.

A neighing horse stopped on the mouth of the cave, saddled and ready to go. Her brother popped his head from the outside, apologetically smiling. "He ran quite far," he said without being asked, caressing the animal's neck.

Indra gathered her belongings and her sleeping son in her arms. After Ashura had fastened the former on the saddle, she spoke, "why?"

"Why what?"

"You know it is a taboo. You did it anyway." She stared at his eyes, the horse grazing between them. "Why?"

"I love you, Sis," Ashura answered without missing a beat, his cheeks tinged with red. "More than just a brother do. It's… it's forbidden according to people… but we're not fully humans—I mean, Dad had horns and Grandma came from the sky?" He gestured with his hands. "Yeah—you get it."

He held her hand to help her climb on the horse. Indra remained still, thinking about Ashura's answer. She looked at her brother, then to her son.

 _Their_ son.

She heard herself asking, "now what?"

"Let's find extra clothes first." Ashura's bare torso shivered. "I'll catch a cold otherwise—ow!" He yelped when Indra pinched his cheek, but contained himself to prevent making a loud noise that would disturb the baby.

Indra seated herself on the saddle. "We shall reach the nearest village by nightfall." Before Ashura climbed behind her, she held his shoulder and leaned down to kiss his lips. "Come on. We can choose a name later while we rest for the night."

He furrowed his eyebrows. "A name? What for?"

"For our son—really, Ashura, you are a father now." She rolled her eyes, but her lips formed a smile. "Stop being so dense."

He laughed, mirthfully. "Sorry, Sis."

Indra kissed their son's forehead as the horse brought them out of the forest. Ashura sat behind her, holding the reins. They were heading back to her dwelling, ready to face whatever consequences destiny threw to them. She realized that he was right.

 _The goddess' blood runs in our veins. Mundane rules do not apply to us._


End file.
